The Portal

Deep inside each of us lies a doorway between existence and nonexistence, between experience and nothingness. In that darkness you find all your abilities to experience the world. This article contains the culmination of the author’s teachings.

black hole

By Edward Muzika

This article was adapted by the author from a longer satsang talk. Click here to hear the complete talk on YouTube.

DEEP INSIDE EACH OF US lies a portal, a doorway between existence and nonexistence, between experience and nothingness.

Edward Muzika

The experiential world as well as all of the categories of experience we call the self lie on the existential side of the portal. Some have called the various levels of existential self, the Self, distinguished from the world. Others claim that all levels of experience are the one self. Opposing this experiential side of life is the posited opposite of nonexistence otherwise known as the noumenal world, nothingness, the absolute, or the witness.

Through intense spiritual practices over many years such as self-inquiry, love and devotion, we can experience all levels of human and non-human, divine self, before encountering the portal. Instead of “levels of self” or “self experience,” I refer to the different kinds of spiritual experiences encountered on the way through the depths of experience, as rooms within our inner spiritual mention, all of which have to be observed, identified with, and then discarded. We have to, for example, entered the room of emptiness a.k.a., the Void, identify with void, and then come to the recognition that the void is really not me.

This we have to do with all the rooms in that spiritual mansion, the room of emptiness, the rooms of joy and sorrow, anger and redemption, grace and condemnation, and salvation, the rooms of love, devotion, surrender, and finally of God realization and self-realization.

Here we have reached what appears to be full realization of the totality of life and death, existence and nonexistence, wherein God as the life force itself, sentience, is aware of itself and all of its aspects experiential and noumenal. We are completely at rest experiencing the constant underlying experience of ourselves as the manifest Self, and as God, as well as nothingness.

Once all of these experiences have been deeply experienced, added to our sense of self, we release ourself from that identification and are free to penetrate deeper levels. Depending upon where we start our spiritual journey, either with the discovery of the vast emptiness within, or with our discovery of God and the manifest self within, there comes a time when we exhaust the inner search and come face-to-face with the portal, the entrance to the absolute nonexistence, which could be called deep self, or when absorbed within, in complete rest as nothingness and eternity.

It is often said self cannot be found or observed by the self. This is both true and untrue. From the existential side of the portal, we are looking into the dark emptiness below that seems to be seething with activity, and we feel a powerful force pulling us toward the other side into our deeper self, addressing from objectivity to subjectivity. But peering into the portal from the existential side we are really looking for activities and powers instead of objects. We are looking into verbs, not nouns. We are looking into our ability to hear, see, smell, taste, touch, move, think, judge, surrender or exert will. What we “see,” really intuit, are vast amounts of unseen energies and powers that trickle up to the portal’s surface of visibility, beckoning us to pass inside to the eternal.

Text copyright © 2019 Edward Muzika. Reprinted from the author’s Facebook page.

Illustration credit: Victor de Schwanberg/Science Photo Library

Edward G. Muzika awakened in 1995 under his guru, Robert Adams. He describes himself as an animal activist and spiritual teacher living in the Phoenix area, interested in all animal issues in the Los Angeles area but especially those concerning cats.

Hear this article as a satsang talk

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Related Books

Self Realization and Other Awakenings by Ed Muzika

Self Realization and Other Awakenings

By Ed Muzika

Max T., an Amazon reviewer, writes:

“Having been into meditation and spirituality for many years, searching for peace and happiness in teachings ranging from traditional Buddhism and Christianity to more new-age like sources like Eckhart Tolle, spending months in monasteries and silent retreats, my heart came to rest when I found the author of this book.

“In this book, Ed Muzika gives a very personal and honest account of his own spiritual search and it’s culminations in both the deep insights of jnana, where one discovers that one's deepest part is totally beyond and not touched by consciousness and oneself as a person living in a world of objects is just a figment of imagination, a dream, and yet never-ending and ever deepening bliss and ecstasy are hidden in one's own heart to be discovered by the bhakta in total loving surrender. through a combination of these two aspects, one is empowered to express one’s beingness and live life to its fullest.

“The path which leads one to these results, the loving of one’s own sense of being and following it down through the myriad layers of consciousness both in everyday life and deep meditation, is outlined by the author in a practical way.

“The down-to-earth and unvarnished manner the author talks of his own experience give faith in the actuality and value of spirituality itself, and in the fact that one can realize for oneself the things the mystics of all times talk about while living a modern western lifestyle, if one is only diligent and persistent.

“Thank you so much Ed!”

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This page was published on December 18, 2019 and last revised on December 18, 2019.


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