By David Godman
I have ended the confusion of my bewildered, suffering mind. A lowly cur, I have merged with the gracious feet of my Master. In the surging brilliance of his divine wisdom’s splendour the broad ocean of deadly desires has disappeared completely.
The dark prison which bound my tortured soul crumbled and I became his servant, finding joyous life in the open sky of his ambrosial grace. The knot which locked my spirit to my physical body was sundered by the bright sword of my Master’s glance and was no more.
I was a learned fool. My flawed mind knew nothing till I came to dwell with Him whose glance filled my heart with the light of awareness. Dwelling in that gracious state of peace, whose nature is holy silence, so hard to gain and know, I entered into union with the deathless state of the knowledge of reality.
As the deadly delusion of a body-bound ego faded, a flower of pure light unfolded at his holy feet. That radiance grew ever brighter with my love until I realised the flawless knowledge of the Self, manifesting as the unbroken awareness ‘I-I’ within my heart.
He became one with my very soul, the Supreme Lord, the flawless Brahman, the life of all that is, the jewel of the Self, turning my soul’s night to day with the fulsome rays of true wisdom’s sun.
The confusion of the senses ended and the world’s illusion was dispelled as grace’s bright sun rose, absorbing me in itself and obliterating all distinctions. And as I entered the light of a life lived in the holy silence of the glorious non-dual state, the ‘I’ and all that arises from it subsided and dissolved away.
I was wandering deluded in the mind’s labyrinth of dreams, rushing hither and thither, desiring one thing then another until the joy of union with the Lord welled up within me. My body merged into the infinite light of divine wisdom and my heart was filled with a deep inner tranquillity.
Corrupted by the senses’ defilement, yet was I drawn by the light of the Self which shone in your eyes so that I conceived a great love for you. With melting heart, like a cow with a young calf, I remain a supplicant at your feet, which hold the twin rewards of birth and final liberation.
Unquenchable, the lamp of grace and true knowledge burns at his holy feet. Through his gentle smile, where grace’s flower blooms, I have renounced and abandoned the ties of kith and kin and I have placed myself beneath those bounteous feet, grasping them closely.
He is the teacher of the eternal law through whose glance the truth unfolded, filling my heart with the dazzling radiance of his blissful consummate grace, so that the body, ego and intellect were all no more. I became merged in the divine silence, which is the abiding knowledge of Lord Siva.
A noble lion, he fixed the victorious gaze of true knowledge upon the rutting elephant of my ego, which was drunk with self-conceit, filling me with the sweet nectar of union with Lord Siva, so that the inner experience of divine wisdom became my whole existence.
I was bound for destruction through my disastrous attachment to the world’s illusory reality until, under my fair Lord’s gracious gaze, my understanding was flooded with the delightful experience of Lord Siva’s bliss, and I entered a new life in the boundless realm of holy silence.
Through the light of enquiry into the nature of the Self, which is true spiritual practice, and through the precious words of my teacher, who is established in the state of holy silence wherein liberation has its origin, my soul has tasted the nectar of union with Lord Siva in the state of bliss beyond duality, merging into the all-transcending oneness of his grace.
Deeply absorbed in the state of holy silence which reality’s perfect light illumines, filled with the exaltation of the non-dual state, my consciousness merged with the Lord and I became one with Him, winning the greatest reward of all, to dwell in final bliss, beyond birth and death.
▲ Note 23. Sri Ramana Anubhuti was first published in 1948, more than twenty years after Muruganar had the experiences he is describing. Even so, the experience he had and the gratitude he feels towards Bhagavan are still uppermost in his mind. The translations are by Robert Butler. [Return to text]
David Godman is the author of almost twenty books about Sri Ramana Maharshi’s life, teachings, and direct disciples.
Edited by David Godman
This is the second volume in David Godman’s magisterial series of biographies of direct disciples of Sri Ramana Maharshi. David goes into considerable detail about a few selected devotees rather than touching lightly on a larger number.
This volume contains chapters on Kunju Swami, Muruganar, T.P. Ramachandra Iyer, Chhaganlal V. Yogi, Lakshmana Swamy, and Viswanatha Swami.
This page was published on October 15, 2001 and last revised on June 12, 2017.